4/2/12 - M&M - Mental Meltdown, Missing Mike, More Mabvuto

Yet another month has passed. Time flies, I thought Christmas just ended... Its already four weeks since we were at the lake. Mike has been away for six weeks. I’m coming home in less then 24 weeks. Its actually quite surreal. Even though it feels like I have been here forever, I also just arrived, 19 weeks ago.

Recovery room

Work is work... Busy days most of the time, long days even more often, the other staff keeps up the good work of coming in LATE. The latest I have left work now is at 5.40pm, one hour and 40 minutes later then I’m supposed to. But I have started not accepting it, but tolerating it. There is nothing I can do about it. I can report I as much as I want, but there is no consequences for them. They cant get fired, cause we need the staff, and its almost impossible to get new ones. It will not effect their salary (when they finally get their salary) and they really don’t care. If I tell them (in the beginning I said it quite nicely, now I shout at them) the just laugh and have some stupid excuse. And I cant find myself to come late at work, even though I sometimes want to come in at 9.00am and not 7.30am. Of course I sometimes come in ten minutes late, but then I feel bad. Imagine!

We have big cases every day, Monday to Thursday its booked for the consultants and their patients, Monday – Dr Chiudzu, head of department, very good, tough and persistent lady, Tuesday for Dr Phiri, really good effective guy, Wednesday for Dr Bonongwe, stupid guy, full of him self, Dr Chiudzu's right hand, Thursday is for Dr Foba, UN volunteer from Cameroon, very good and funny guy. So my favorite days in theatre is Tuesdays and Thursdays, and some Fridays, cause that day is for emergencies only, and for scrubbing theatre if we have time.

On Wednesday I had one of my worst days at work since I started, just because of this idiot of a doctor. He made my day hell, difficult to explain, he is just so important that everything he says is the law. But I’m getting there, I have started talking back to him, and it might seem to work, its just that he was worse then usual on Wednesday.

And when Friday came my day was also bad. I think I’m in a bad period here now... I am so angry and irritated with these people that always come late, I thought I could handle it, and just don’t give a shit, cause I am here to help, and that is my main aim here, but I have reached a point where I really am upset about this. So yesterday I went to talk to the Matron, to say that if this continues, which I think it will, I am not interested in working there, at least be the in-charge. I really don’t want to quit working in theatre, but I cant just be working and not having any life outside of work in the weekdays. She understands me, she says, and she wanted us to have a meeting with the other staff, and she wanted to talk to the head of department (Dr Chiudzu) and she hoped this was something that we could work out. She didn’t want me to leave theatre either. So when I came back to theatre, I said to one of the nurses that today it was her turn to wait for the night staff to come. “No, I’m so tired” was the reply I got. I could understand that, cause she had also been on night duty he previous night, so I went to the other nurse, and she said she would do it, if I wanted her to get robbed on her way home. And she laughed, and I told her how sick I was of always being the one to wait for the night staff, and that I every day sit there until 5pm, if not later, and she just laughed again. I told her I was serious, its not funny, but people here are not good at talking serious to each other. But she said she would do it. So I scrubbed for the last case, and while I was there assisting the surgeon, this nurse left... I was so angry I could cry! (that’s what I do when I get really angry..) So the one that was so tired were there with me, but I couldn’t give a crap! I left at four, leaving her there, and I was so upset when I walked home, I was about to cry several times. I’m so sick of these people here now, I don’t know if its just a bad period now, or if I’m for real fed up, we'll see. Thankfully I have Tone here, which I can talk to about my frustrations and problems!

One morning I came to work, I found a bird
in our recovery room...
Just outside our theatre... Imagine!

We are still struggling with getting the things we need at the hospital, but at least it seems like its getting a little better. I have given my staff the surgical caps, and they look so nice all of them. I should take a picture one day and post it. But I haven’t given to all of the once I wanted, I’m just waiting for some more to be made.

But the pharmacy and stores at the hospital are acting like they own the place and the items they are supposed to hand out to the different wards and departments. Several times now I have experienced that the order book comes back from stores, and it says that most of the things are out of stock. But if you go there and check for your self, you find that they have a lot of things. The system and politics in these stores are messed up! I don’t even know how they are thinking!

Last weekend I went to Nkhoma to see my friends. I stayed at Gunhilds house, and I was hooking up with Jessi, Amanda and Keith. It was nice to see Keith again, he was my best friend in Nkhoma last year, but I haven’t met him yet, cause he has been in Blantyre at school, but now he moved back to Nkhoma.

Friday I just had dinner with Gunhild (risgrøt! Yummi!) and Saturday we went to the market to do some shopping, buy too many chitenjes, and we had lunch, not at Mr Banda, but at Gunhilds place. In the evening we had dinner there with Jessi and Amanda. Sunday I left for town around noon. It was a nice and relaxing weekend.

Rain season is really getting to us now. Well, its not like its raining all day, but when it first starts its crazy! It can even be days where there is no rains, but the days it does, it is so amazing. All the thunder and lightning, every ten seconds, the downpouring, the power of nature is breathtaking!

Thursday I walked home from work, as I usually do, and the minute I stepped outside it started pouring, seriously! I was so wet when I came home, I had to “swim” across rivers, draining systems in this country is not the best, and surprisingly I didn’t meet many people on my way. Its like the city stops when its raining heavy, nobody wants to walk in the rain, cause then they get malaria... Yeah, what ever...

This weekend Gunhild is coming to town, hopefully we can go out on Saturday. I am so up for a night out, getting some drinks, dancing, meeting people! I really hope so. There isn’t much I do during the week, I’m usually late home from work, and tired. So I stay home, working out, watching some Scrubs, chatting with Tone, basi... And talking to Mike of course! Who I miss like crazy these days. And it doesnt make it better when I’m having a hard time at work as well.